Christmas Handicap 2007
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Did Tony win because he was worth his salt?
Or because Ross was promised a Speyside Malt?
Dougie lost me before the Iron Well
Coz he flew off like a bat out of hell!

I never even saw Neil so I wouldn't know
Whether he was too fast or I was too slow!
Murdo Alex must've ran at near top speed
Coz he passed me by before I left the Creed!

As for the blones, how did they fair?
I think they stopped to do their hair!
She didn't win, the cute dark- haired bitch,
Coz she stopped and sniffed in every ditch!

What happened to Alasdair on the day?
Sadly he ran real fast but lost his way!
And how did I do? Well I came last!
Coz not one person allowed me passed!